Crikey, he stole my coffee!
by Kasdan
Summary: Coffee deprvation and Croc Hunters. -Chapter 10- The secret behind Daniel's haircut, and a new off-world mission. :D
1. The Coffee Culprit

:Disclaimer: I could own Stargate, yah never know. So sue me.  
  
:Notes: I have this fear of Steve Irwin, so this, naturally, came out. Not quite sure what I'll do with next chapters...  
  
----  
  
Close-up of scary, blonde Australian.  
  
"Welcome tao tha Crocodile hun'er once more! I'm Steve Urrween, an' todah I've go' som'in MUCH bett'r than before..." The scary, blonde Australian all but yelled into the camera, causing the poor cameraman to wince.  
  
The cameraman closes up on a book being written in, writing blurred. "Todah.. we've go' an incredib'y raahr speesheez. Theyreh smart, and witty, and tend tae wear glasses and sneeze a lawt." Cameraman (Lets call him JoeBob) zooms out, revealing a man in his 30's with medium length of brown hair and glasses looking pissed, pouring over books, and trying to ignore the alleged blonde Australian hovering him.  
  
"Thees is an rchaeologist/Linguist/Anthropologist/Whatever. Now, observe what happens when ah deprive it of it's life-foorce... cawffeen." Steve snatched the archaeologist/linguist/anthropologist/whatever's coffee slowly.  
  
The brown-haired creature peered the spot where his coffee was just moments before. He snarled,   
glaring. Muttering something in a language seemingly Latin, he advanced on the culprit, baring his teeth. "Coffee..." he murmured. "Must... have... coffee..." Attempting to snatch his coffee back, he lashed out at the coffee-stealing freak.  
  
"CROIKEY! See wha happans? It's voile! If we continyew like this, he could very wel' mess up mah makeup!" realizing what he'd just said, the blonde screeched a screech that even Screech himself would be proud of, running off screen.  
  
----  
  
Daniel shot up in bed, forgetting his dream completely, but having a sudden craving for coffee. Slowly, he got up and headed for the kitchen, grabbing his glasses off the bedside table in the process. "Crikey." he muttered.  
  
----  
  
:AN: Is snatching something slowly even possible?! I know it was a little short, but it's almost time for wee me to sleep, so. 'Night! Please R&R! :) 


	2. Filing cabinet, meet Danny

:Disclaimer: I may not own Stargate, but I'm asking for it for my birthday! :D  
  
:Notes: OKAY. People last time thought I was against Australians. I'm not. Only Steve Irwin! Grr. Thanks to Meg & Alex for the beta'ing. Love yah guys. :D  
:More Notes: Wrote this in math, drinking coffee and wanting more. Cartesian plans are the most boring things I've ever seen   
in my LIFE.  
  
----  
  
Daniel swayed back and forth in the chair he was sitting in, whilst visiting Jack. Jack, bonking him in the nose with the   
paper airplane he'd just finished out of a notice marked 'Important', followed him with his eyes. Back, forth, left right.   
"What's your problem?"  
  
"Coffee."  
  
"Out of it again, are we?"  
  
"Coffee."  
  
"Use mine."  
  
"Cr#ppy."  
  
"Gets me through the day.  
  
"Cr#ppy."  
  
"What?  
  
"It tastes. Like cr#p."  
  
Jack stuck out his tongue and spun around in his big, comfy chair. Daniel wondered why he didn't have one like that. And why   
Jack had more coffee than he did. "Fine then.  
  
Daniel lifted himself from the chair, wincing, and slowly walked in the direction of the filing cabinet. Jack blinked.   
"What're you doing?"  
  
"Maybe Teal'c has coffee."  
  
"Daniel, Teal'c doesn't DRINK coffee. He doesn't drink BEER for cryin' out loud!"  
  
"Maybe he started."  
  
"You're delusional."  
  
"Maybe so, but I'll find coffee."  
  
"Not with Teal'c."  
  
"Screw you."  
  
"I wish" Jack muttered.  
  
Daniel whammed into the filing cabinet. Jack took his shoulders and directed him in the way of the door.  
  
----  
  
:AN: Does Teal'c have an office? 'Cause he does now. 


	3. Whumph the hell!

:Disclaimer: Yaddiya.  
  
:Notes: This was written same time at Chap 2... and 3... and 4...  
  
----  
  
Typing furiously, general hammond muttered the words of his report under his breath. "Damn you, Pentagon."  
  
*WHUMPH!*  
  
"What the..."  
  
*WHUMPH!*  
  
George ran to the door and opened it. An archaeologist, almost asleep, fell on his shoulder, muttering "Teal'c." over and over. Hammond picke dit off carefully, grabbing his arm, stating that he was going ot the infirmiry, and dragged him out the door.  
  
"No. Teal'c. Need Teal'c." Daniel shok himself free and staggetred in the direction on the infirmiry.  
  
Hammond took his shoulders as Jack did, and directed him in the way of Teal'c office.  
  
Returning to his office, George shook his head. "First thing this afternoon, he's seeing Fraiser."  
  
----  
  
:A/N: Short, I know. It seemed a lot longer on paper... 


	4. Inanimate Evils

:Disclaimer: Screw the lawyers.  
  
:Notes: This looked longe ron paper, too... :/ after this, the chaters'll be longer, I promise.  
  
----  
  
Teal'c blinked at the seemingly sleep-walking Daniel. "I do not consume caffine, DanielJackson."  
  
"Shure yah do."  
  
"No, I do not."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Incorrect. Perhaps MajorCarter would suppply you?"  
  
"Sam..." Daniel muttered, whamming into yet another inanimate object, being a door once again.  
  
"Ar eyou sure you are well? Perhaps we should ask Doctor Fraiser."  
  
"No. She'll stick things in me. I want coffee."  
  
The Jaffa shrugged, picke dup the deprived archaeologist, and headed in search of Sam.  
  
----  
  
:AN: Okay, these are too short. They'll get longer from now on. 


	5. Door Dillemas and Multiple Noses

:Disclaimer: I need coffee before I go to court... so sue me.  
  
:Notes: LONGER! MWAHAHA! Another written in Math class. The whole post-bar thing and the sneezing's just for Megs. ;)  
  
----  
  
Sam handed Daniel a mug. His eyes lit up. "Coffee?" she nodded. He jumped up, hugged her, and chugged it. "You're a lifesaver, Sam." "'Welcome." He held out his mug. "More!"  
  
"You sure? That'd make... four..."  
  
"MORE!"  
  
"Okay. Just don't bite my head off."  
  
"But it's good!"  
  
"Doesn't matter."  
  
"Aww..."  
  
A knock on the door revealed Jack standing in the doorway. "Hey Kiddies!"  
  
"Morning Sir."  
  
"O'Neill."  
  
"Hey, Jack-o!" Daniel bounced on his stool."  
  
"I take it you found the life-force?"  
  
Daniel giggled insanely and sneezed.  
  
"I'll take that as a yes. Ooh, um... Frasier's looking for you."  
  
"Okidokie. It's a lot better than YOUR cr#p excuse for coffee, Jack." he stared at Sam, bouncing slightly in his chair. "One   
more cup..." he gulped down a fifth mug, shook his head vigorously, and laughed. "FREEDOM!" he ran out the door to the infirmary. Jack, Sam, and Teal'c followed in suit.  
  
"Carter?" Jack requested.  
  
"Yes, sir?"  
  
"Small warning: Never, ever give Daniel more than two cups."  
  
"Point taken, sir."  
  
"Good."  
  
----  
  
Janet heard a loud 'thump' and ran to her office door, seeing Daniel sitting on the ground, rubbing his face. "I think I broke my noses?"  
  
"You only have one nose."  
  
"YOU might only have one..."  
  
"Daniel, are you stoned?"  
  
"Will you take coffee as an excuse?"  
  
"Oh, lord. Not again."  
  
"Leave your door open next time."  
  
Jack, Sam, and Teal'c stopped at the door. The two humans were panting, Teal'c just stood there, like he normally does... all day long... what a boring life he must have...  
  
Janet looked at Daniel. "Sit."  
  
"I am."  
  
"On a chair."  
  
"But--"  
  
"Daniel?" she implied, tapping her foot.  
  
"Yes ma'am..." he muttered quietly, crawling into a chair. He sneezed, causing Jack to roll his eyes.  
  
"You three can stay or go." They didn't move. "Alright. Now..." she looked back at Daniel. "Hammond's informed me of your door dilemma this morning."  
  
"Oops."  
  
Jack muttered, "which one?" Janet glared. "Sorry, Ma'am."  
  
"As I was saying, before I was so RUDELY interrupted," she glared once more at the colonel. "Hammond told me what happened. What did I tell you about coffee, Doctor Jackson?" Daniel muttered something and looked at the wall like he was ashamed. "Hmm?"  
  
"No more than two cups...?"  
  
"That's right."  
  
"But..."  
  
"No buts, doctor's orders."  
  
The dreaded DO. "Shucks."  
  
"That's right."  
  
----  
  
A few hours later, everyone was hanging out in Sam's lab once again, Sam being pissed at the minimal amount of work she was doing because of it, and Jack was making another 'Important' airplane.  
  
"Jaaack, Saaam. I've got a request for you two."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Let's goooo. Get a drink."  
  
"Now?"  
  
"Now."  
  
"NOW?!"  
  
"Now!"  
  
Sam and Jack looked at each other and nodded. "Teal'c say yes?"  
  
"I did in fact decline, MajorCarter."  
  
"Okidoke." Sam, Jack, and Daniel grabbed their coats and ran off.  
  
----  
  
Another while later, the three were sitting at a table, drinking beer when an oaf of a biker came over and loomed over   
Daniel.  
  
Daniel pushed his glasses up his nose. "Can I help you?"  
  
"Out of my chair."  
  
"I THINK I'm sitting in it."  
  
"Out."  
  
"No."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"No."  
  
The oaf picked Daniel up by the front of his shirt, staring at him. "Are you trying to tell me something?"  
  
"Idiot."  
  
Jack stood up and poked the oaf. "'Scuse me?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
Raising his fist, Jack socked one in the guy's mouth. He dropped Daniel on the floor with a nasty-sounding crunch. Daniel's eyes closed as his head hit the floor.  
  
"Oh shit." Jack moaned. "Sam, get in the car."  
  
Sam poked him. "Sir?" she pointed at the guy just starting to stand up. Jack knocked him back on the floor.  
  
"Sam, go call 911 or something."  
  
"Yes, sir." she ran to the bartender, who'd been watching the whole thing in awe, his eyes still open, his mouth gawking. "Excuse me?" the bartender turned to Sam, face still the same. "EXCUSE ME?!" he blinked. She slapped him. "HELLO?! PHONE?!"  
  
"Oh, yeah. Okay. Here." A stunned hand timidly pushed the phone in her direction.  
  
----  
  
"The doctor says you broke your ankle and you've got a minor concussion."  
  
"From being dropped on the frigging FLOOR?!"  
  
"Yup."  
  
"Shit."  
  
"My sentiments exactly. Since you've been in here for three days, they said you can go home today..."  
  
"Finalement." 


	6. A lump of crippled archaeologist and a c...

:Disclaimer: BLAH.  
  
:Notes: Had to find some way to get it in, so from last chapter and this one will be cheesy... Megs' big conspiracy.  
  
----  
  
Sam walked out of Daniel's room and looked at the clock. 0200. Sighing, she reclaimed her place on the chair. "If he wakes up one more time..." Sam shivered, unrelated to her previous statement.  
  
"You'll shiver?"  
  
"Not quite, sir. Just cold." Jack'd already stolen Daniel's only blanket.  
  
"Come join me."  
  
"You sure sir?"  
  
"Positive."  
  
She looked at her CO and shivered again.  
  
"Should I make it an order?"  
  
"You're truly evil..." Sam grinned, wrapping her arms around herself and plopping her body beside Jack's while he draped the other half of the blanket over his 2IC.  
  
"The minute Daniel's ankle gets better..." Jack mused. When no response came, he turned to see Sam'd fallen asleep on his shoulder. He stroked her hair and lowered himself to stretch on the couch, hoping Sam would sit. She slipped down in front of him, and Jack shrugged. She must really be tired... He smiled and wrapped his arm around her, brushing her hand. Sam's hand slipped in Jack's and she snuggled into him. Jack closed his eyes and breathed deeply, drifting into sleep.  
  
Daniel crept to the doorway as much he could, wincing in pain. Jack didn't seem to hear him.  
  
There was a light on in the living room, they must still be awake... He peered around the corner and stopped where he was. Jack and Sam. Spooning on the couch. Mm, this was a story liable for Janet. *EG*  
  
But he'd need proof... where was it.. Aha! The cripple took a snap with his camera. Last shot on the roll. He should get it developed...  
  
----  
  
Sam peeked an eye open. She didn't remember falling asleep... she felt breathing on her neck... Weird. The Major turned around gently and noticed just what that breath was coming from. Her eyes widened. Jack?! What the... oh yeah. They were on the couch last night, weren't they. Hmm...  
  
Sam slipped off the couch, careful not to wake the Colonel, and headed towards Daniel's kitchen.  
  
----  
  
"Who's in the kitchennnnnn." moaned the lump on Daniel's bed.  
  
"Meeeee." Sam moaned just as loudly. The couch critter stirred.  
  
"Saaaaaaaam?" groaned Jack, getting up from the couch.  
  
"Yaaaaaaah?"  
  
"Mooooooooorning."  
  
"Moooooooorning."  
  
A Daniel stood leaning in the doorway, a clump of plaster on his right leg. "You two sound depressing, stoppit." he rubbed his eyes. "What time is it, anyway?"  
  
"1100 hours." Jack answered, looking at his watch. Daniel glared. "Oh, I'm sorry your majesty. 11 am. Satisfied?"  
  
"Very... Gimme that." he swiped at Sam's mug of coffee.  
  
"No coffee, remember? Doctor's orders!" Sam grinned. The lump shuffled closer, trying again. Sam laughed and hid behind Jack.  
  
"Grr."  
  
"Sir?"  
  
Jack turned around, still standing as a barrier between a lump of crippled archaeologist and a coffee-baring USAF Major. "Uh huh?"  
  
"Hide the coffee."  
  
"Will do." he sauntered off to get the numerous cans of exotic coffees and related concoctions that would induce caffeine-induced traumas like the days before.  
  
----  
  
A couple hours later, Daniel was mumbling and grumbling, saying he'd be fine, and trying to shoo Jack and Sam out the door.  
  
"Need a ride tomorrow?" Jack asked, swinging a bag full of coffee back and forth.  
  
Daniel watched it intently. "Think I can drive?"  
  
"Point taken."  
  
----  
  
Jack stepped on the brake, cursing quietly about red lights.  
  
"Sir, I know you hate reds, but swearing won't convince them to change."  
  
"Maybe some day..."  
  
"No."  
  
"Damn."  
  
They drove in silence for a while longer. Jack slowed down. "We need to talk."  
  
"Yeah, I think so too."  
  
He stopped the car and turned in his seat to face Sam.  
  
"This never happened..."  
  
"No sir. Never ever."  
  
"We have to forget about it. Clear it from our minds."  
  
"Clear what?"  
  
Jack grinned and stepped on the gas. "That's my girl."  
  
----  
  
:AN: Trying to get out of the whole ship thing. It's addictive once you start. The Irwin plot & coffee sessions'll start up next chapter, I promise. 


	7. Wot a straynge creeture!

:Disclaimer: GIMME STARGATE!  
  
:Notes: Thanks so much for the reviews, guys :D I have NO idea when this story will end, because I don't know what I'm WRITING! I don't even know what the next sentence will be! Well, now I do. It was 'Well, now I do.' But that's irrelevant. I'll see where this takes us. More Steve, some 'ship, and.. yeah. (Mario style) Here we goo!  
  
----  
  
Jack pushed the wheelchair in to elevator, with Daniel muttering 'Ooh, watch it..', 'ow!', and 'that was close!' all the while.  
  
"Will you just shut UP?!" the colonel yelled, sliding him into the elevator.  
  
"OW!" Daniel's ankle bumped on the wall.  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Shure."  
  
"I am!"  
  
"No you aren't."  
  
"Maybe not, but you know I am somewhere deep down." Jack said sarcastically.  
  
"Whatever."  
  
----  
  
Daniel wheeled into his office, hitting his swirlytwirl chair in the process. He picked up the phone on his desk, dialed a number, yelled "SOMEBODY TAKE THIS FREAKING CHAIR OUT OF MY OFFICE!" and slammed it back down, rolling the chair furiously out of his way.  
  
There was a knock on the door. "Daniel?" he looked up.  
  
"Hey, Sam!" he said with an evil grin.  
  
"When did you get THIS?!" she held up the picture that he'd recently developed, furious. It showed Jack and Sam on the couch...  
  
"Take a guess." he replied. Janet came to the door with the same mischievous grin plastered on her face.  
  
"Hey, Saaam." she help up a certain picture.  
  
"YOU GOT IT TOO?!"  
  
A Jack came to the door, holding up a picture. "Hey, Danny." he said with a forced smile. "HOW DID YOU GET THIS?!" he yelled.  
  
"Oh, shit..." Daniel muttered. Jack advanced.  
  
"Who has this?!"  
  
"Um.. You.. Sam.." Jack looked at Carter, she held it up. "Janet... and me."  
  
"Are you SURE it's only us?!"  
  
Daniel let out a meek 'uh huh', retreating to the other side of his office.  
  
"Carter, come to my office."  
  
Sam glared at Daniel and nodded a 'Yes, sir.' and trailed out behind Jack.  
  
----  
  
Jack sat on his desk, motioning for Sam to steal the chair and put his head in his hands. "How did he get this?"  
  
"I don't know... what should we do?"  
  
"I'm supposed to know?! I'm the guy! I'm supposed to be tall and look menacing! And carry around big guns!"  
  
"That's Teal'c's job... and I carry big guns, too."  
  
"Shuddap."  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
O'Neill ran a hand through his short hair thinking. "What're we gonna do about this whole thing?... I mean, it's against regs, and --" the phone rang. He picked it up. "O'Neill." he listened for about ten seconds, calmly said "No coffee for Danny, now be on your way with those translations. 23 languages should come in use." and slammed it phone down. "As I was saying..." he looked up at Sam.  
Damn she looked good.  
  
"As you were saying?..."  
  
...  
  
"Are you okay sir...? Is there something wrong?"  
  
He shook his head and regained the ability to speak. "No, nothing."  
  
"Well, obviously these pictures are going to circulate the SGC. We've got to do something about it."  
  
"Like what?" Jack looked clueless. Sam's turn to oggle.  
  
Damn, he was cute when he was clueless.  
  
"I donno... um..."  
  
Jack slumped and decided to take a certain interest in his bootlaces. "This sucks."  
  
"Yes, sir, it does."  
  
"Not that. The one person I love and I'm not allowed to." Sam's eyes widened.  
  
"P-pardon?"  
  
"And I'm not sick with something, so don't send me off to Frasier to poke needles in me."  
  
  
"But what you just said --"  
  
"Was true." he looked up.  
  
Sam met his gaze. "Really?"  
  
"Yeah. I know it sounds kinda whacked, and it's inappropriate, but that's how *I* feel and... yeup." he clacked his boots together.  
  
She smiled. "Me too."  
  
Jack blinked. Damn his clueless look...  
  
"What do we do now?"  
  
"Um... I donno."  
  
"Hammond should know."  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
"Let's um... go tell Hammond..."  
  
"Okidokie." Jack got up and put an arm around her shoulders as they wandered off in search of their General.  
  
----  
  
Janet spotted the two and called out "Saaa-aaam!" in a singsong voice. Sam grinned, turned around and matched the tone with a "Get looo-oost!"  
  
----  
  
Jack rapped on Hammond's door. The usual 'come in' reply rang through. Jack opened the door and they walked in.  
  
"Morning General." Sam said with a nervous smile.  
  
"Hello Major, Colonel." Jack nodded back with a 'heya'.  
  
"What can I do for you two?"  
  
Jack pushed the toe of his boot into the ground. "Umm... We need to talk to you..." he placed his hand on the small of Sam's back, where the general couldn't see. She relaxed.  
  
"About what?"  
  
Sam looked up. "We kinda screwed up the regs again..."  
  
Hammond's head cocked to the side. "How??"  
  
"Well, um, you know that one... about, um..."  
  
"Relationship." Jack finished. Sam nodded.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
"No problem."  
  
"Yes, I do. And what does that have to do with this visit?"  
Jack discovered the wall looked pretty interesting.  
  
"We kinda messed that up."  
  
"How so."  
  
"We kinda have feelings for each other." the two said at once, and then kinda of jumped at saying the same thing.  
  
"I've heard." Hammond replied. "Now. I don't have a problem with that, but --"  
  
Jack grinned. "You don't?"  
  
"No, but don't interrupt me."  
  
"Sorry sir."  
  
"That's better. Now, you have to listen closely and follow as I say. When you're on the battlefield, you'd better act like you two aren't... together." they nodded. "In the base, you must be discreet. And I don't want to receive any word from the alien friendlies about the two of you being intimate whilst on a mission." they nodded again. "Other than that... good luck." Hammond smiled.  
  
Sam and Jack grinned, both hugging him, and went off in search of that certain pain-in-the-ass archaeologist.  
  
----  
  
Daniel slammed his head on his desk as the major and the colonel walked into his office.  
  
"Coffee... coffeeeee..."  
  
Jack took a pencil from the abused desk and poked the linguist with it. "Daniel...?"  
  
Daniel's head shot up, staring at Jack. "Hi Jack.. hehehe..."  
  
"Hello, Daniel. Guess what?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Hammond knows." he glared at Daniel.  
  
Daniel laughed. "I bet you two are in trouble!"  
  
Sam stood in front of Daniel, looking furious. She's putting on a good show, Jack thought. "You ASSHOLE. WHY WOULD YOU."  
  
"Sweet revenge."  
  
Janet came prancing to the door and grinned evilly at Jack and Sam.  
  
"Hey Janet, GUESS WHAT." Jack yelled.  
  
"What? You two gonna run off to a broom closet?" Janet and Daniel both snickered at the lame excuse for a joke.  
  
"No. Hammond knows." he glared.  
  
"Shit. You two in trouble?"  
  
The couple grinned and O'Neill put his arms around Sam's waist. "Nope!" he said, the grin spreading from ear to ear.  
  
"You lucky dogs."  
  
Janet was cut off from a slamming sound being emitted by the desk.  
  
"Coffee..."  
  
Jack took a chocolate bar out of his pocket and threw it at Daniel. Here yah go, Danny!"  
  
Daniel groaned and resumed his slamming. Sam and Jack muttered something about being needed in another room, and Janet left for the infirmary. With everyone gone, Daniel drifted into sweet sleep... or so we think. (ominous music inserted here)  
  
----  
  
Daniel was running through a library... running?! Why? Was it from somebody? Something? He didn't know, but he felt like he was needing to run. He peered behind himself, seeing something... so... horrendous, so... frightening, that he couldn't stand the sight. He ran faster, not succeeding in outrunning his pursuer. He hid behind a bookcase.  
  
"Croikey! See that? When yew tayke away his cawfee, he terns on yew!"  
  
Daniel hissed. "Give me back my coffee, bitch."  
  
"Enrayged archaeologists have kwite a temper! without thayr cawfee, they tern from mellow geeks tao ferocious beats!"  
  
"I want it back." A camera was shoved in his face. "Ow... the light..." he cowered in a ball on the ground, muttering in a foreign language.  
  
"Thiss haz gawt to bee wan of thee STRANGEST creatures ever tao bee showne on here on thee 'Kkrawrkadial huntah'!" he downed Daniel's coffee and grinned.  
  
Daniel screamed, falling into a hole and woke up, bathed in sweat.  
  
"THAT *BEEP* STOLE MY COFFEE!" he looked around, bewildered. "What the *beep*? It's going *beep* every time I say *beep*..."  
  
(voice sounds from ceiling)  
  
"Daniel, thou shalt not swearith."  
  
Daniel snaps up straight, not having a clue as to the voice that had just happened, but feeling inclined not to swear.  
  
----  
  
:AN: I SO wanted to write 'Sack and Jam' but I donno why :P and that last part was COMPLETELY random, I have no idea what it was. I just had a sudden urge to write it... 


	8. You don't have snakes in your heads, do ...

:Disclaimer: Sue me to hell, 'natch.  
  
:Notes: Okay, that was freaky. Right after I uploaded chapter seven, I went to go watch the Discovery Channel (amazing-ass channel, yupyup) and it was the Crocodile Hunter. I swear, it scared me out of my socks. I intend less S/J and more psychotic Australian phobias but who knows. S/J seems addictive...  
  
----  
  
Jack stared into the phone and replied.  
  
"I hardly think there's such a thing as Irwinophobia, Danny."  
  
"Who says?"  
  
"You're the linguist."  
  
"Shuddap."  
  
----  
  
Even Hammond looked bored. The team was in the briefing room, finding out where their next mission would be.  
  
"Anyway, we don't think there's any life there, but that doesn't mean a beer bash... or anything else." the general finished, looking discreetly from Jack to Sam. Jack looked away, Sam blushed.  
  
----  
  
Jack bounced out of the Stargate, looked around, moaned, sticking his head in his hands, and groaned.  
  
"TREES?! MORE TREES?! WHAT THE HELL'S WITH ALL THE TREES?! JESUS! THERE MUST BE SO MANY F#CKING TRESS IN THIS UNIVERSE. WHY CAN'T WE FIND ONE PLANET. JUST ONE. WITHOUT A FRIGGING TREE?!"  
  
Sam stepped up. "Sir?"  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"Calm down."  
  
O'Neill smoothed his hair and let out a long breath. "Okay... calmed..." he glared at the trees. "But one more world with trees and I'm requesting 3 years' leave."  
  
Daniel glared. "And I'm requesting COFFEE." Jack stuck his tongue out.  
  
"Okay, kids, where to now?"  
  
"The Goa'uld found it logical that the Stargates were to be stationed by a large city. Like a place of commerce. Perhaps we should search it out."  
  
"Sounds like a plan. We're off!" Jack bounded up in front, with the other three trailing behind.  
  
----  
  
A couple miles north, they found small settlement. Not much, but seeing as how there weren't any visible weapons, there hopefully weren't any Goa'uld around.  
  
"Hellooo?" Jack called out. "Anybody hoome?"  
  
A hut rustled, and out came a humanoid creature. Pronounced jawbones, elongated ears, a smug nose. The eyes were positioned on the side of it's head, tall, upright opals of black with small tiny dots of light green or blue for pupils. It was tall, around seven or seven and a half feet, lanky, and wore a tunic and pants that looked like hey were made out of potato sacks. Daniel stepped up. "We are peaceful explorers from the planet Earth."  
  
The alien cocked its head to the side and said something from the slit it had for a mouth. Daniel paused for a minute before replying, sounding like he was speaking in gibberish.  
  
"Daniel?"  
  
"It's Mayan... I think it's got some Lat--"  
  
"That's great, but what's he SAYING?"  
  
"Oh. Um. Around the lines of 'who are you'..."  
  
The alien spoke again. Daniel replied. They had a short conversation before he turned back to Jack.  
  
"They want to know if we have good intentions."  
  
"Well, tell them yes!" Jack started to get annoyed.  
  
"I did. He said we have to undergo some sort of.. religious ritual..." Daniel sounded uneasy.  
  
"And...?"  
  
"It's... um... they... have access to our minds."  
  
"Shit."  
  
"And that's not all.."  
  
"There's more?!"  
  
"They do it with the four of us. We all access each other's minds."  
  
"Double shit."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
The alien spoke. Daniel nodded. "He wants to know."  
  
Jack looked to the other three, who nodded. "Tell him we'll do it, Daniel."  
  
Daniel nodded to the alien and said something. The alien's eyes flickered, and he motioned them to follow. SG-1 did so.  
  
----  
  
The four were in a hut. Nothing strange, the alien had just said that that was where the ritual was to take place and it commenced.  
  
"We call on our spirits, the ones who have passed..." a voice sounded in their heads.  
  
Jack jumped. "What the --"  
  
Sam's eyes widened. "You guys hear that too?" the others nodded.  
  
Jack's eyes follow suit. "It's like... surround sound..."  
  
"Help us clear their minds and uncover what they intend to bring upon us."  
  
A different voice sounded in their heads. "Weirrrd..." it was Jack.  
  
----MIDNOTE---- Now, I'm writing it script'ive now 'cause it'll be easier. This is all in their heads... But the motions are actual, and they've all got their eyes open.  
  
Sam: Sir?  
  
Jack: Carter?  
  
Daniel: Jack?  
  
Teal'c: You obviously do not need me to verify O'Neill's existence any further.  
  
Jack: Thanks.  
  
Teal'c: You are welcome...  
  
Daniel: This is awkward.  
  
Sam: Tell me about it.  
  
Daniel: Just did.  
  
Sam: Evil.  
  
Daniel: Eviler.  
  
Sam: Evilest.  
  
Daniel: Evilester.  
  
Sam: HA!  
  
Daniel: Damn.  
  
Jack: Sam looks cute today...  
  
Sam (blushes): Sir?  
  
Jack: That was out loud?  
  
Daniel: In a sense.  
  
Jack: Oops...  
  
Teal'c: It appears O'Neill has uncovered his feelings for you, MajorCarter.  
  
Sam: He already has.  
  
Jack: And she me, so don't even note it Teal'c.  
  
Teal'c: Indeed.  
  
Daniel: Take me to the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty...  
  
Jack: Daniel, stop singing.  
  
Daniel: Sorry, Jack. It's stuck in my head.  
  
Jack (puts his hand on Sam's leg): Screw regulations.  
  
Sam blushes.  
  
Teal'c: That would be a most unpleasant form of pleasure, I believe.  
  
Jack: I didn't mean literally, Teal'c.  
  
Daniel: Take me hooome, yaaah...  
  
Jack: Danny.  
  
Daniel: Sorry Jack.  
  
Teal'c: What are we doing here. We do not seem to be... discussing things of any relevance.  
  
Sam: We're supposed to be showing good intentions.  
  
Teal'c: Yet, we are not.  
  
Daniel: Oh, won't you please take me hoomeeeeeeeeeee  
  
(Jack kicks Daniel in the leg. Daniel expresses pain. In various, child-friendly forms.)  
  
Daniel: Ow. Ooch. Eech.  
  
Jack: Good thing I missed the other ankle, eh?  
  
Daniel: I've got crutches.  
  
Jack makes motion to hide behind Carter.  
  
Sam (pats his head): There, there.  
  
Jack barks. Sam laughs. Daniel shakes his head.  
  
Teal'c: We have good intentions.  
  
Daniel: Obviously, we wouldn't be able to lie easily in our heads.  
  
Sam (leans on Jack): We just broke another reg.  
  
Daniel yawns.  
  
Teal'c: We do not mean any harm at all.  
  
Jack: Not unless you've got snakes in your heads.  
  
Daniel (muttering): Or if you have a hidden stash of coffee.  
  
(Voice booms) We have finished our examination  
  
Jack: Whoopee!  
  
Teal'c: And we did not feel a thing  
  
Daniel: In the Navy...  
  
Jack: Daniel. Sing one more song and I'll kill y--  
  
Daniel (dancing): Gotta shout it for the Y-M-C-A! (evil grin)  
  
(Jack whacks with his hat)  
  
Sam: Finally!  
  
----  
  
Another of the tall aliens had gathered them out of their examination hut, introducing itself through Daniel as Selka. Apparently, after the 'freaky Vulcan thing', as Jack called it, they would be able to understand the language, but it would take some time.  
  
----  
  
Take another two and a half hours and SG-1's in a long, tall hut, listening intently to what the Rael's elders have to say about an alliance with the Tau'ri.  
  
"I think it would boost morale of the Rael's people if we had an alliance." Yanni announced, standing up from his chair. His voice was as he was sitting in an orb, like the rest of the Rael's voices once the team started understanding their speech.  
  
"But we would gain an enemy!" Taln pointed out form the opposite end of the table.  
  
"We would gain FRIENDS, young Taln." One of the eldest, Eather, nodded.  
  
"Goa'uld?! FRIENDS?!"  
  
"Tau'ri! Humans! The Asgard would be able to help us as well, and we'd have no need to fear the Tok'ra."  
  
"But the Goa'uld would come and--"  
  
Daniel stepped up. "Excuse me?" all gray-green and gray-blue heads turned to him, tiny pupils directed at him. "Taln is right." Jack cursed under his breath. Daniel ALWAYS had to do something like this... "They would come. But they'd come anyway. They'll go to any world with a Stargate, but we can stop that if enough of us band together!"  
  
There was a slight murmur throughout the hall-hut.  
  
Eather looked to her left at Opahl and his right to Waynise, and the three nodded in turn. She stood up, easily seven feet, and walked smoothly over to Jack, extending its hands.  
  
"We welcome our new allies with piece of mind and a good becoming of." she grasped Jack's shoulders. He strained to do the same, but with no avail.  
  
Opahl stood up. "It is the coming of the Reen! Let us feast and sort the relations in the morning!" she said with what couldn't have a doubt as a grin.  
  
----  
  
:AN: I tried my hand at offworlding. Coffee episodes will pick up soon. Maybe I'll make Jack have Hyplophobia or something, too. :P Word didn't think Irwinophobia was a word, but it suggested 'Irwin phobia'. I should look into that... R&R! 


	9. As gummy bears go by

:Disclaimer: I DO OWN IT! MWAHAHAHAHA!  
  
:Notes: Um.. yes... S/J, more offworlding... coffee... Did you know that cafeteria coffee sucks? Just thought I'd note that. I had to rewrite everything after Jack's first 'Cool' 'cause it was SO shippy and it was HORRIBLE. I've got a new plan! :)  
  
----  
  
Music thundered through the woods surrounding the small Rael settlement, and sounds of laughter and the thumping of large feet on soiled ground.  
  
Sam leaned towards Daniel. "Reen's night?"  
  
"Think so."  
  
"Cool." Jack added, from the other side of Sam.  
  
"Indeed." Teal'c added.  
  
They'd had their 'feast', whereas they'd discovered that this world cultivated...  
  
----  
  
"COFFEE BEANS?!"  
  
Daniel looked like he was in heaven. Which mind you, he probably was, but that's beside the point.  
  
Teal'c looked into the small basket. "It appears so, DanielJackson."  
  
Jack grabbed a couple, stuffed them in his mouth, winced and nodded. "Starbucks worthy. And YOU," he added, wagging a finger at the linguist, "are not to have ANY."  
  
"But Jaaack!" Daniel whined.  
  
"Our dear, dear needle-happy doctor said WHAT again, Dannyboy?"  
  
Daniel looked down. "No coffee." Jack ruffled his hair.  
  
"Thassa good boy, now."  
  
Daniel glared. Sam reached into the container and picked out a handful, staring at them. "Are you sure these are safe, Sir?" she asked, picking at one.  
  
"Safe as snow!" he answered, the other three looking at him with a blank expression. "They won't kill you?"  
  
"Let's hope you're right, then." she shoved them in her mouth, winced, and shook her head, letting out a sigh of relief. "Nice."  
  
The two dug their hands into the basket for more.  
  
----  
  
"It's SG-1, sir." the airman noted.  
  
"Open the iris." Hammond ordered, walking out the door to the stairs that led down in the direction of the 'Gate Room. When there, he stood in his normal spot, awaiting the arrival of his best, and oddest, team.  
  
The wormhole ensued, and SG-1 walked out. Well, partly walked. More of a skip really. But not Teal'c or Daniel, oh, no. They were walking as they normally did, with a bit more caution. But Jack and Sam? Full-out Wizard of Oz.  
  
"Hel-lo, Sir!" Jack called out in a sing-song voice, arm-in-arm with an equally peppy Sam, the two grinning ear-to-ear, giggling occasionally.  
  
"Welcome back, SG-1. Mission successful?"  
  
"It appears so, GeneralHammond." Teal'c pointed out, eyes shifting towards the unusually hyper Sam and Jack.  
  
"What is the meaning of this?"  
  
Daniel muttered something about coffee.  
  
"Doctor Jackson?"  
  
"Coffee beans. They ate the coffee beans."  
  
The older (much, much older) man looked in the direction of the viewing glass. "Doctor Frasier and a med team down here!"  
  
----  
  
Jack drummed his fingers on the side of the bed rather quickly, eyes looking like they were glued open. "Saaam?"  
  
On the infirmary bed beside him, an equally loud drumming came from an equally energetic Sam. "Siir?"  
  
"I'm bored."  
  
"Me too."  
  
"Let's do something!"  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"Uh... Play?" Jack made the motion to yank his arm up from its place beside him, but it was held firmly in place by restraints. "For cryin' out loud!"  
  
"It doesn't matter sir! We can still have fun!"  
  
"How so?"  
  
"Drive the nice doctor into an insane oblivion!"  
  
"How so?"  
  
An evil grin spread across her face. "A song."  
  
"I like that! Which shall we sing?"  
  
Sam opened her mouth wide and started off. "This is the song that never ENDS... it just goes on and on, my FRIENDS..."  
  
"Some people STARTED SINGING IT, not knowing what it WAS!" Jack joined in.  
  
The two went on... and on... and on...  
  
----  
  
"Doctor Frasier, he's awake."  
  
Janet moved over beside the bed and loomed over the previously unconscious colonel.  
  
"Hello, Colonel. Sleep well?" She asked with an evil smile.  
  
"I COULD answer that, but seeing as how all I know is you poked me with a rather large-ass NEEDLE, I'd prefer not to, MAJOR."  
  
"Doctor Frasier, she's awake." the monotonous infirmary assistant said.  
  
Janet shifted herself around to face Sam on the opposite bed. "Hello, Major. Sleep well?"  
  
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! DON'T ANSWER THE WOMAN!" Jack yelled out from his own bed. Sam just glared at her.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU STICK IN ME?!"  
  
"Just a little something."  
  
"Little?!" Sam fumed. "That could've knocked Teal'c out five times over!"  
  
"It certainly did a number on you two." Janet muttered with a mischievous smile on her face. "Now. Short check and I think you two can leave."  
  
"Woohoo!" Jack whooped.  
  
Sam picked at the IV tubes. "How long've you stuck those things in us for?"  
  
"A week."  
  
"Holy." Jack muttered.  
  
"Yes. Just how much of those coffee things did you eat? A soon as you got up, you'd bounce around the room. Three lieutenants had to hold YOU down so I could give you some seds." Janet pointed at Jack.  
  
Sam looked at Jack, and he looked back. "Um... only a couple?" Sam murmured.  
  
"Daniel says you ate the whole thing."  
  
Jack became interested in the wall. "Maybe."  
  
"Well, anyway. General Hammond says you guys have a couple days off for recovery when you're sane again. And those beans seem to have an overbearing effect on humans... strong coffee."  
  
"Duh." Jack pulled at his wrists and then his head flopped on the pillow, and he let out a sigh. "I take it I know why we're restrained?"  
  
"You two were hyper as hell. Three days, we had to listen to you singing 'This is the song that never ends' and having rather LOUD conversations about gummy bears and As Time Goes By."  
  
"As gummy bears go by…"  
  
"You two are a bad, bad influence."  
  
"Why thank you."  
  
----  
  
Jack hummed loudly, swinging across the doorway to Sam's lab unnoticed and slammed the door, making her jump and drop her clipboard.  
  
"Sir! You scared me!"  
  
"That was the point, wasn't it?" he grinned. Sam smiled.  
  
"Need help with paperwork, I assume?"  
  
"Naw. I came with an offer."  
  
"Of what kind?"  
  
"Dinner?"  
  
"Bah, I don't feel like going out tonight."  
  
"At my place."  
  
"You can't cook."  
  
"I can try."  
  
"Alright, I guess so." she smiled.  
  
"Just promise not to sue for food poisoning?" Jack gave a goofy smile.  
  
Sam gave him a skeptical look, but gave away and shrugged. "Why not. Just.. don't make crushed ice?"  
  
Jack grinned.  
  
----  
  
/Bordem./ Daniel though, poking his Aztec voodoo doll with his pinky. /Bordem. Bordem... Jack. Jack solves bordem. Let's go find Jack./  
  
----  
"Damn the doorbell. I'll be right back." Jack stormed over to his door, looked through the peephole, sighed heavily and turned the handle, yanking the door open. "Hullo Daniel."  
  
"Hey Jack... hey, you're dressed up. Why're you dressed up?"  
  
"Is 'none of your business' a good answer?"  
  
"Geez, don't be so pissy. I was bored, so I wanted to se if you were busy."  
  
"Obviously, I am."  
  
"With what, then?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"It's a date, isn't it? Knew it. It's gotta be a date. With who?" the linguist rambled on, trying to peek inside the house.  
  
"Once again, none of your bee's wax."  
  
"Oh, c'mon!"  
  
Jack looked over his shoulder to where Daniel wasn't able to see, whined a bit, then nodded. "Fine." he turned back to the 'geek' standing in his doorway.  
  
"Who?"  
  
Sam walked over silently and slipped herself under Jack's free arm. "Me."  
  
"Sam. Well, okay. you could've just TOLD me..."  
  
Jack grinned. "But you're so cute when you're pissed!"  
  
Daniel shook his head, gave his partings, and left in search of Teal'c. 


	10. Is it who we think it is?

Notes: I'm not coming back 'til the Saturday AFTER Christmas, so this is indeed quite late. But bare with me, okay?  
Thanks to ScullySayer for the idea of camping. :) Unfortunately, her other idea of Teal'c getting dragged off by a large animal without anybody noticing, and then wolves howling in the distance wouldn't exactly work out right. And Teal'c giving Daniel his gift was also her idea. She gets the honorable mention of the day. :)  
I also don't know why I like the idea of Teal'c bewilderment. :) IE - Bounce, Cultural Values of Bikinis, and something else I've been working on for a while [not posted yet.]  
Merry Christmas. :)  
  
----  
  
"Teal'c?" Daniel called from outside the other's door.  
  
"I am here, DanielJackson. You may enter." came the reply from inside the room.  
  
Daniel opened the door and crept inside, peeking his head in. "Whatcha watching?"  
  
"'A Muppet Christmas Carol'. It is very... individual..."  
  
"Yeah, that pretty much describes the Muppets." Daniel muttered, taking a place beside Teal'c, prepared for an hour of furry marionette-puppet offspring mutant things running across the screen.  
  
----  
  
The next morning, Daniel hustled into the SGC, rubbing his hands and blowing on them and such, shivering like a madman. He grumbled and chucked his coat on his office chair, throwing his bag down on his desk just as Sam walked by.  
  
"Uh, Daniel...?"  
  
"What?" he asked, looking particularly pissed.  
  
"Your hair."  
  
"What about it?"  
  
"It's kinda... frozen..."  
  
Daniel picked at his hair which was frozen in clumps and grumbled a couple more sentences of inappropriate words. "No way."  
  
"You might want to defrost it or something, 'cause we've got a meeting with Hammond in fifteen minutes."  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Yeah. D'you want some help?" Sam asked, watching Daniel try and blow on his hair. "You're not a blow-dryer..."  
  
He shrugged. "It worked with my hands."  
  
"They're quite far from your hair."  
  
"Shuddap." The pair looked around the office, dumbfounded, searching for something to provide heat.  
  
"The heater!" She yelled out in victory, grabbing Daniel's ear and dragging his down to sit on the floor beside her.  
  
A quiet 'what the he--' was all Daniel managed to say as Sam shoved his hair under the heater.  
  
"This way, you'll be all nice and fluffy-clean by the time the meeting rolls around..." she stood up, "Keep your head there. I'm just gonna go get a towel or something. I'll be *right* back!" and ran off.  
  
----  
  
"Where were you?" demanded an exasperated archaeologist, head under a heater.  
  
"The SF's in the showers weren't very happy about a mere astrophysicist stealing a towel." she replied, chucking a towel at Daniel.  
  
"It smells funny in here..."  
  
"Your office."  
  
"Something's burning." Daniel said, sitting up, hair dripping.  
  
"OHMIGOD!" Sam yelled, smothering Daniel's head with a towel just as the sprinklers went off.  
  
"WHATTHEHELL?!"  
  
"YOURHAIR'SONFIRE!"  
  
"OHMIGOD!"  
  
"AHHH!"  
  
"MY HAIR!" he rolled on the floor, extinguishing the flame in the back of his head.  
  
Sam stood on his desk and shut off the sprinkler. "We'd better make sure you didn't... burn your head or anything."  
  
"You burnt my hair off, you monster!"  
  
"You froze your hair. I proposed a solution--"  
  
"You shoved my head under a heater!"  
  
Siler burst into the door, armed with a fir extinguisher. "What the hell is going on in here?" he stopped dead at the sight of Daniel and stifled a laugh. "Doctor Jackson, nice hair. I hear it's all the rage."  
  
"Sam set my hair on fire." he muttered back, glaring.  
  
"Ma'am?"  
  
Sam blushed. "I didn't know what would happen!"  
  
"Well, they thought you guys were having a bonfire down here when the sprinklers went off. I take it the hair's what smells so bad?"  
  
"Shuddap." Daniel muttered once again.  
  
"I'm gonna have to file a report. Don't know how, but..."  
  
Daniel glared at his boots. Sam grabbed his wrist and headed in the direction of the infirmary. "Thanks, Lieutenant! You have fun with that... report there, okay?"  
  
Siler gave a casual-looking salute and headed off in his own direction.  
  
----  
  
"Well, the good point is you didn't burn any skin." Janet said, peering at Daniel who was sitting on an infirmary bed, and Sam who was snickering silently behind him, leaning against a wall. "Bag side, you'll need a haircut."  
  
"And I have a meeting in," he glanced at his watch. "Three minutes and fifty-two seconds."  
  
Janet hustled away and came back with a pair of scissors. "What d'you want it to look like?"  
  
"You're cutting my hair?!"  
  
"Well, yeah."  
  
"No way!"  
  
"I can do it." Sam suggested.  
  
"Okay, Janet. Go for it!" Daniel closed his eyes tightly, wincing.  
  
"Crew cut?"  
  
"Whatever. Just. Make it look good."  
  
"I've always wondered what Daniel'd look like with a ceaser-thing." Sam suggested.  
  
"'Ceaser-thing' it is!" Janet proclaimed, snipping away at Daniel's hair while Sam tied a towel around his shoulders. "Oops."  
  
"Oops?!" Daniel demanded. "Why 'oops'?!"  
  
"Never mind."  
  
Daniel grumbled while Sam pointed out a spot Janet missed. A couple minutes later, Janet untied the towel and held a mirror out in front of Daniel. "As much as I hate to admit it..." he raised an eyebrow.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Nice. Thanks."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
----  
  
Daniel and Sam jogged down the hall to the briefing room, random members of SGC turning heads to compliment Daniel on his hair. The two jumped into their swivley chairs, Hammond, Jack and Teal'c blinking at the usually punctual scientists.  
  
"Nice of you to join us, Major Carter, Doctor Jackson." Hammond nodded at them.  
  
"Sorry we're late, sir." Sam apologized.  
  
"Sam decided to set my hair on fire."  
  
"I did not! How was I supposed to know it would burn?"  
  
"You stuck my head under the heater!" the two feuded. Meanwhile, Jack was having fun listening to their dispute, shoulders rising with a laugh. Teal'c had raised a trademark eyebrow, fingers drumming against each other.  
  
"What the hell happened to you, Daniel?!" Jack asked, chuckling.  
  
"I'll explain later." he shot a glare at Carter, who stuck her tongue out at him.  
  
"SG-1, calm down. I have important news." Hammond demanded, causing the four to shut up instantly. "Now. The Tok'ra have managed to find a new base."  
  
"Nice." Jack stated.  
  
"Yes. But they have some matters for you to attend to."  
  
"But... after Christmas?"  
  
"That's some of the bad news."  
  
"There's more?" Daniel asked, already appalled at the idea of being off-world for Christmas.  
  
"They're required a member of the Pentagon to join you."  
  
"Damn." Daniel muttered.  
  
"Anyone in particular?" Jack asked, the rest of the team all thinking of the same unfortunate joiner.  
  
"I've taken up the matter with the Pentagon already. They've suggested Major Davis."  
  
"Shit!"  
  
"Colonel O'Neill! I know it's unfortunate, but watch your language."  
  
"Sorry, sir."  
  
"You mean, Major Davis is coming with us to the Tok'ra base?" Sam asked, climbing to the point of being pissed-off.  
  
"Unfortunately, yes. I would have suggested otherwise but they insisted on him."  
  
"Humbug." Teal'c and Daniel stayed silent, both looking equally mad.  
  
"There's... more."  
  
"What else can possibly go wrong?" Jack asked sarcastically.  
  
"It's a four-day hike to the base."  
  
"FOUR!?"  
  
"Yes, four. Your escort will meet you half-way, but they have provided only directions for the first two days."  
  
Daniel exhaled a breath he didn't' know he'd been keeping, Jack slammed his head against the desk, Sam sighed, and Teal'c sat motionless, observing the other three members of SG-1.  
  
"When do we leave?" Jackson asked.  
  
"Tomorrow."  
  
"But it's the day before Christmas Eve Day!"  
  
"Tok'ra know no Tau'ri celebrations." Teal'c pointed out.  
  
"Well, they should." 


End file.
